The legend of Bash's sarcastic smile

Presto(narrator): City of Viletown, 1:30 PM, the same day like any one. But, everything changed... And this is a story that I’ll tell for everyone, and the story called... “The legend of Bash’s sarcastic smile”. On the day, in the living room, me, my brothers and the Rowdyrights, except Bash, are playing racing video games, then, my brother Abracadabra wins the race again...

Abracadabra: Yoohoo! I win again!

Blake: It’s not fair!

Abracadabra: Rematch?

Blake: Yes, let’s go!

Breaker: C’mon, Bash! Let’s play the next racing match!

Bash: [sitting on couch, reading the book] Nope.

[Presto starts looking at Bash]

Breaker: C’mon, let’s go!

Bash: [still reading the book] Nope. I prefer reading the book about crows.

[Presto stops playing and goes to Bash reading his book]

Presto: Are you reading the book about crows? I like crows!

[Bash closes the book]

Bash: [moving away from Presto] Go away. [opens the book and continues reading]

Presto: Oh, you will not share the reading with me?

Bash: [still reading] Nothing is worse than someone comes to annoying me while I’m reading.

[Presto approaches Bash from behind the couch]

Presto: I’m not annoying you, Bash. I’m reading with you. [looks the magic crow’s curse] Hey, bash. This isn’t the magic crow and the curse?

Bash: [looks up to Presto] Yes, but, this is a part of story of fantasy and the superstition. [continues reading the book]

Presto: “Superstition”?

Bash: Yes. Is a belief in supernatural causality: that one event leads to the cause of another without any physical process linking the two events, such as astrology, omens, witchcraft, etc., that contradicts natural science. [Presto gets dumb and starts drooling a little bit] It’s also commonly applied to beliefs and practices surrounding luck, prophecy and spiritual beings, particularly the belief that future events can be foretold by specific unrelated prior events. It’s casual, isn’t it? [Presto wakes up from dumbness]

Presto: Oh, yeah, right! But, unusual things are part of superstition?

Bash: Stop asking me and let me read alone.

Presto: [moving away from Bash] Sorry, Bash. Feel free to read your book while I make snacks in the kitchen, okay?

[Bash continues reading]

Presto: Ok. [goes to the kitchen]

Blake: [throws game control pad down] I give up!! Your turn, Alakazam!

Alakazam: Yay! [gets the game control pad]

Breaker: Oh, oh, I wanna play it too!!

Blake: No, you don’t! You broke five control pads in a day and I’m have to go to the game shop to get the new ones between the Powerpunks, and I have too much time to detain them to go into our home!

Breaker: I’m so sorry. [looks Bash again] Wanna play the game a little bit?

Bash: I said “no”.

[in the kitchen, Presto makes nachos]

Presto: Well, superstition is looks like a good and bad luck. So, the good luck looks like a four-leaf clover and the bad luck looks like a black cat crossing the victim and... [thinks] Hmm... Unusual things brings good luck or bad luck? Unusual things that can be happened is a curse? [gets fizzy pops] Hmm...

[Presto goes to living room, puts the snacks and fizzy pops on the table, looks to Abracadabra, to Blake, to Breaker, to Alakazam, to Bash]

[when Bash finishes the reading of the book, Presto goes to bash again]

Presto: Hey, Bash! Have you smiled today?

Bash: What are you talking about? Do you think I never smiled since Jomo’s creation?

Presto: Well, I--

Bash: I never smiled, I’m just smart, thank you.

[Presto walks around living room, thinking, eating nachos, drinking fizzy pop]

Presto: [notices it about bash and snaps fingers] That’s it! [goes to Abracadabra] Hey, bro!

Abracadabra: [still playing] Yes?

Presto: Say it to me: the bash’s unusual smile is a curse?

Abracadabra: What are you talking about?

Presto: The Bash’s smile! The superstition means that amulets brings good luck and weird happenings, includes black cat crossing the victim brings bad luck, includes unusual things!

Abracadabra: And so?

Presto: I don’t know. Maybe Bash’s smile brings bad luck like black cats. And if the Bash’s smile are sarcastic? The Bash’s sarcastic smile can be a curse? [Abracadabra is finishing the race game match] And if Bash’s sarcastic smile can be a permanent curse? The curse is really bad? Is he evil?! Bash’s sarcastic smile is a curse! [shakes Abracadabra] BASH’S SARCASTIC SMILE IS A BIG CURSE, I SAY!!!

[accidentally, let Abracadabra loses the race game]

Alakazam: I won! I won!! I’M THE FIRST PLACE AFTER MY BRO ABRACADABRA!!! Yaaay!!!

[Blake and Alakazam jumps happily]

Blake and Alakazam: We’re are winners!! We’re are winners!!

Abracadabra: PRESTO, YOU STUPID! YOU MADE ME LOSE THE GAME RECORD! I WAS BREAKING THE CONSECUTIVE RECORD, AND YOU MADE ME LOSE!

Presto: [nervous] I-I’m so sorry!

Breaker: Hey, hey! It’s my turn! [gets the control pad, and plays the next race quickly too much that breaks the control pad and the game race car breaks the tv glass and flies off the tv screen and flies out of window of kitchen and goes to the dynamite shack that in a mile away and explodes the entire block, making a huge mushroom-formed smoke and appears a 8-bit “GAME OVER” on it]

Everybody: [looks at explosion] o_o;

Blake: Give me fifty dollars, Abracadabra. I’ll buy a new control pad and the tv fix. [Abracadabra gives fifty dollars to Blake]

Breaker: I’m so sorry! [Blake flies away with broken tv, everybody looks Breaker, Breaker holds a chessboard] Board games anyone? [Abracadabra slaps hand on the face]

[two hours later in the kitchen...]

Presto: [arrives in the kitchen] Hello again, everyone! Is it lunch already?

Breaker: Yes, Presto! We have sushis, rice n’ beans, warm corns and orange juice! Please have a seat! *chuckles*

Presto: Thank you! [sits a fart cushion on the chair that makes a loud noise, getting horrified, looking quickly at Bash]

[everybody, except Bash, laughs at Presto, Abracadabra looks at Presto’s horrified face and stops laughing, everybody stops laughing, looking at Presto]

Abracadabra: What happe--?[Presto shuts his mouth]

Presto: Shh! [continues looking Bash, Abracadabra looks Bash]

[Bash looks Presto and start reading a book]

Presto: [relieves] Phew! He didn’t even smile.

Bash: [looks at Presto] What?

Abracadabra: What’s happening, bro?

Presto: [gets the sushi, warm corn and orange juice cup] I’ll explain at living room. C’mon. [goes to living room, Abracadabra follows him]

Breaker: [to Presto] Presto, why you not laughed with everyone after you fooled with Blake’s fart cushion pra--?

Alakazam: [shuts breaker’s mouth] Shh! Shut up!

Breaker: Sorry.

[after the explanation at the living room...]

Abracadabra: What’s up, bro? Bash’s sarcastic smile is not a curse! It’s just a simple superstition!

Presto: But, that’s a simple superstition, bro! If Bash smiles sarcastically at victim, bad things can be happen!

Abracadabra: Wake up, bro! You’re imagining things!

[Bash sits on couch, reading the book]

Presto: It’s really true, bro! Unusual things can be happen, even--

Breaker: [quickly appears near Bash] It’s tickle time! [in slow camera, Breaker approaches his hands towards Bash’s armpits]

Presto: [flies towards Breaker] Nooooooooooooooo! [bumps Breaker in slow camera, in normal camera, Presto and Breaker bumps on wall]

Breaker: [to Presto] What’s wrong with you? I’m gonna tickle on Bash!

Bash: Huh?

Presto: But, I won't let you start the curse!

Breaker: [gets questionable] Huh? What curse?

[Bash continues reading the book]

Abracadabra: The curse of Bash’s sarcastic smile, Breaker. But, he thinks that Bash’s smile is a big curse, but it’s really not.

Breaker: [notices about it] Oooh, yeah, right! [goes to Bash] Hey, Bash. Presto thinks that your sarcastic smile is a curse.

Bash: I know it. And this curse doesn’t exist. It’s just Presto’s imagination.

Presto: [to Bash] But it exists for sure! Unusual things can be happen, Bash! Even with your sarcastic smile!

Bash: What?

Abracadabra: Bash, he thinks that your smile is a curse, but I have a plan... [whispers a plan at Bash’s ear]

Bash: Well, that’s not a bad idea.

Presto: o_o ?

[In the afternoon at the living room, Presto relaxes reading a book about crows]

Bash: [arrives at living room] Hi, presto!

Presto: Hi, Bash!

Bash: I heard you about the curse. I haven’t smiled today, isn’t it?

Presto: Okay, but, don’t make a little single smile, okay?

Bash: [smiles at Presto] Are you sure?

Presto: *gasps* [flies quickly towards the exit door] RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!!

Blake: [getting hurt by Powerpunks, opens a door with fixed tv and the new control pad] I’m back!

Presto: [flies out the exit door] AAAAAAHHHHH!!!

Blake: [to Bash] What’s wrong with him?

Presto: [goes to Blake] IT’S BASH’S SMILE!!! [his scream scares Blake, letting throw tv and control pad to tv table on the right spot]

Blake: PRESTO, STOP SCREAMING ON MY EAR!!

Presto: S-Sorry!

Blake: [to Presto] What’s wrong with you? You are crazy?

Presto: No! I’m escaping from Bash’s sarcastic smile curse!

Bash: [smiles again] Like this?

Presto: [to Bash] Yes it is. [notices it and gasps, flies away on the other side from Bash] RUN AWAY!!! [flies accidentally on Breaker’s sweet pancake batter in the bowl]

Breaker: [happily] Hey, hey, hey, Presto! Do you like my pancake batter so much? How is sweet! I’m the good baker, isn’t it?

Presto: No it’s not! [gets out of pancake batter bowl] It’s Bash’s sarcastic smile curse!

Breaker: Oh.

Abracadabra: [arrives at living room] What’s going on here?

Presto: It’s the curse! Bash smiled twice! [Bash sarcastically smiled again] Oh no! Bash smiled again!

Abracadabra: Ooh, is it? Maybe is getting worse.

Presto: Like what?

Abracadabra: Like an ice cream tricycle is going to attack you!

Presto: [runs into outside of the house] AAAAUGHH!!!

Abracadabra: *chuckles, laughs* It’s better than the tv!

Bash: [looks Presto outside] Umm... [nudges Abracadabra] Abracadabra...

Abracadabra: What’s up?

Bash: I think you better take a look outside.

Abracadabra: [goes outside] What? [looks Presto warning to everybody about the curse, gasps]

Presto: The end is near! The end is near! It’s Bash’s sarcastic smile curse!

Abracadabra: [detains Presto] No, wait! I’m just kidding, bro!

Presto: What?

[everybody goes outside near Abracadabra and Presto]

Abracadabra: The Bash’s sarcastic smile curse is a rumor. [pats Presto’s back] Don’t worry, bro.

Presto: o_o …

Abracadabra: Right?

Presto: o_o … The Bash’s sarcastic smile curse is terrible!

Abracadabra: C’mon, bro! It’s not a curse! [points to Bash] Look at him!

[Presto looks Bash’s face, Bash sarcastically smiles]

Presto: [points to Bash’s face] See? It’s a curse!

Abracadabra: Wake up, bro! It’s not a curse! [looks Bash’s face, Bash sarcastically smiles again, points to Bash’s face] See? It’s really not a curse! So, let’s relax and let’s get some ice cream, okay?

[an rogue ice cream tricycle attacks Abracadabra, letting some popsicles flies everywhere between everybody]

Breaker: Popsicles from sky! Yay!

Presto: Wow! The curse only works with someone who doesn’t believe in Bash’s sarcastic smile curse!

Abracadabra: Oow... [gets out from under the ice cream tricycle, getting hurt] What happened?

Blake: I don’t know.

Presto: See? Who believes in Bash’s sarcastic smile curse to not get hurt by ice cream tricycle?

Abracadabra: What?

Bash: [smiles sarcastically again to Abracadabra] You heard Presto.

Abracadabra: Huh? [the game race car comes from exploded dynamite shack hits Abracadabra’s head, turning the game race car in pixels]

Breaker: [shocked] Race car attack!

Abracadabra: [being thrown into basement’s door, down the stairs] AAAAUGHH!!! [being thrown intro dryer, turning on, the dryer throws Abracadabra out the basement’s door, into the floor] Oow again.

Presto: Wait! It’s not a curse! But, yes, It’s a legend!

Alakazam, Blake and Breaker: What?

Abracadabra: Why?

Presto: Because the curse who affected at you is permanent!

Abracadabra: WHAT?

Blake: [to Presto] Wait a minute! The curse is really a legend?

Presto: Yes! The legend of Bash’s sarcastic smile!

Blake: Ooh.

Bash: [smiles again at Abracadabra] Do you believe in the curse?

Abracadabra: Never! [he gets stomped by Oppressor Plutonium’s walking giant fighting robot] Okay, okay! I believe in your curse, Bash!

Presto: Legend!

Abracadabra: Whatever!

Presto: But it’s too late to get rid of curse!

Abracadabra: But how I get rid of it?

Presto: It’s simple, bro! You just believe in the legend for just one week and you're done!

Abracadabra: [gets shocked] ONE WEEK?! [gets desperate] I believe in the legend all the time!! I believe in the legend all the time!!

[everybody, except Bash and Presto laughs at Abracadabra]

Presto: [sarcastic] See? Who believes in the curse that is really a legend?

Bash: [sarcastically smile at Abracadabra] Yeah.

Abracadabra: [gets electrocuted by a lightning, but he’s fine, walks away from Bash] Stop smiling, Bash!

Bash: [still sarcastically smiling at Abracadabra] What?

Abracadabra: [gets stomped by fifty-meter african elephant stampede, still fine but hurt, still walking away from Bash] I said stop smiling!!

Bash: [still smiling more sarcastically at Abracadabra] Are you sure?

Abracadabra: [gets crushed by a one-hundred feet tall giant greek column, still fine but even hurt, still walking far away from Bash] Yeah, but, JUST STOP SMILING SARCASTICALLY AT ME, EVEN LAUGHING--

[Bash starts laughing evilly]

Abracadabra: ...evilly. [gets crushed by a giant cruise ship, still fine but even hurt]

[Bash continues smiling normally]

Presto: [shocked] *gasps* [flies to Abracadabra] Are you okay, bro?

Presto(narrator): And so, ends the origin of “The legend of Bash’s sarcastic smile”. Moral of the story: “Before acting, verify the Bash’s smile one more time.”

Narrator: And so, the day is saved! [Bash appears, still smiling normally] Thanks to Bash and his smile!

Bash: [stops smiling] Okay, now I’m not smiling anymore. Can I go home now?

THE END